Thirtyone Days of May
by AirKnitter
Summary: Wolf and Yuuri get sucked to Earth and are stuck there for the month of May. What will they do? A series of Drabbles for the whole month updated daily. A challenge response. Join in! Read and review.
1. Chapter 1

Thirty-one Days Of May

By: AirKnitter

Disclaimer: Don't own KKM or anything else recognisable. The plot is the only thing that truly belongs to me.

This story is written for my good friend whose birthday is this month. I was going to have her beta, but that would ruin the surprise, wouldn't it? It takes place on Earth, and is a major What If? story. Just pretend Wolf hasn't been to Earth and that Yuuri's parents have never met him, but they have heard Murata talk of him. I will endeavour to write a drabble a day about their adventures on Earth and as such, I will update daily. If you review and give me an idea for something the guys can do while on Earth, I might use your idea and dedicate a chapter to you. But, if you don't ask, you won't receive.

This will be for a challenge that I'm doing with CheyanneChika and Stupidmusehatesme. If you want to join, just send a message. You must be able to commit for the whole month.

Without further ado, on with the story!

Prologue

There is in another world, a place which is the home of the demon race known as the Mazoku. This place is known as Shin Makoku. In Shin Makoku there is a young king, the 27th King to be exact, and he was running through the castle of Blood Pledge with his black hair flying out from his face, wide black eyes seeing nothing as he runs from his pursuer, a blur of gold and blue.

'Where can I hide? WHERE?!?' Yuuri turned a corner and knocked down his Earth friend, The Great Sage, Ken Murata.

"Hey Shibuya-!" he started, he got no further as the young king vanished through a doorway. He straightened himself up only to be knocked down again by the blue and golden blur, now revealed as Wolfram von Bielefeld.

"Where is that WIMP?!? Don't protect him I know I saw him come this way! WHERE DID HE GOOO?!?!?" Wolfram had lost all semblance of sanity, and looked down at his victim whom he had been shaking him into near unconsciousness. "…oops, sorry, Geika"

Murata regained his feet, dusted off his sleeve, then let a smile cross his face. An idea of total evilness came to him, whispered into his ear by the ever so clever Shinou. "Why, of course, Lord von Bielefeld. Shibuya went into the bathing room, just through there." he said, pointing the way. Wolfram stalked off in the direction that was pointed to him, muttering about unfaithful fiancees and the joys of roasting them on spits.

"A-HA! Found you, you cheating wuss!" Wolf stalked forward in an ominous manner, causing Yuuri to try to inch away in the opposite way.

"Wolf, come on! Let's be reasonable here! We're both mature…ish, we can work this out!" Yuuri made a dash for the door, but Murata blocked his exit! He was grabbed from behind and pulled into a painful restraint move that would put any pro wrestler to shame and just when he was about scream for mercy from the stronger Mazoku, he felt hands push them into the bathing pool.

Wolf sat up spluttering in hot indignation and yelped when the whirlpool popped up and sucked him down the drain with Yuuri! He couldn't do anything but hold on for dear life to the king and ride it out to the end.

Yuuri, meanwhile was not aware that he had a passenger attached to him and was very happy to see the lights of Earth in the distance. His head broke the calm surface of the water, he was suddenly aware of two unpleasant facts: 1. Wolfram was clinging to his uniform shirt and about to faint, and 2. They had popped up in his family's bathroom and his dad was sitting nude not 3 feet away from him and Wolf, looking at them like they both sprouted a second nose.

"Hi Dad, I'm back."

Wolf: "…" Faint….

Dad: "Ummm, good?"

That's the end of the prologue. Heh I'm so mean to leave it there, but oh well. Tune in tomorrow for the start of the boys' adventures that will stretch out for the month of

May.

P.S, If you want in on this challenge, send me a personal message for the rules. It's lots of fun!

Oh, and of course drop a review too.


	2. Chapter 2

Thirty-one Days of May

Disclaimer: same as the prologue.

a/n: Ok, I got an interesting suggestion that I couldn't pass up on. This one has been done before, but I added a bit of a twist. This chapter goes out to yuuram2fangirl, thanks for the suggestion!

May 1

Yuuri Shibuya was extremely proud of himself. He had managed to sneak past his mother and Wolfram that morning and was now enjoying visiting with his friends from school.

"Hey, why don't we go see that movie-"

"Hey, you see that hot chick from -"

"Oh yeah! Her boobs are huge-" Blah blah blah.

It was the same thing every time. Yuuri had almost felt himself wishing Wolf was there to hold an intelligent conversation with. 'sigh' Oh well…

He looked in front of him and noticed the crowd of people parting, some being forcibly pushed, others seeing their neighbours being shoved roughly aside, moving of their own volition. Yuuri's two friends looked up in time to see a blonde, flat chested girl throw herself into their friend's arms.

"SAVE ME! PLEASE!! THE WOMAN'S INSANE!!" the pretty blonde sobbed into the t-shirted shoulder. Yuuri noticed that the soldier was wearing a pink sun dress and had pale pink lipstick on the complimented his pink painted fingernails. Ugh.

"All right! Shibuya! Who's the chick? She's hot!"

Wolfram looked up at being called poultry and opened his mouth to make a hateful rebuttal, but he was cut off by the most frightening sound of all: "WOLFIE-CHAN!! Come on. We still have to get you hair and nails done! Oh, Yuu-chan. Have you seen Wolfie-chan? I thought I saw him here with you… oh well!" Miko skipped off looking for her blonde victim.

"Is she gone?" Wolfram asked in a hushed whisper while coming out from hiding behind the vibrating massage armchair.

"Yeah, she's gone." he rolled his eyes in his annoyance at being caught.

Wolf sized him up and pulled all his fury to the front of his mind before cutting loose on him "you stupid cheating wimp! How dare you leave me alone with that woman! She put me in this damn dress-" yadda yadda.

Suddenly, Yuuri gave a loud shout, "MOM!! WOLFIE-CHAN IS OVER HERE!!"

"DAMMIT HENNACHOKO!!!!" Yuuri had a peaceful day with his friends. They saw a movie and he tuned them out while they talked about whose boobs are bigger and other such trivialties.

When he got home that night, he found himself locked out of his bedroom with a pissed off Wolf inside.

Yuuri: Come on Wolf! I want to get ready for bed!

Wolf: GRRRR how do you get this crap OFF??!!?

Yuuri: At least you're pretty….

Wolf: *opens door* "…"

Yuuri: BUHAHAHAHAAA!!!!! NICE LIPSTICK!!!

Wolf: STUPID WIMP!!!!!

a/n there you go. First day and already he's been made a woman. That's my take on Miko and Wolf shopping at the mall. Just because he wears a pink nightgown, doesn't mean he likes cross dressing in drag, no? please review and offer suggestions! Oh, and does anybody know if the Japanese celebrate Mother's Day like we do? I think it's in another month though.


	3. Chapter 3

Thirtyone Days of May

Chapter 2

Disclaimer: See prologue.

a/n: This one is inspired by my good friend CheyanneChika, The Original Queen of Mean. The keyword here is pickle jars.

May 2

Wolfram and Yuuri were home alone. Shouma-san was at work, and Mama was out shopping for dinner. Wolfram had refused to go with her, even when she begged and gave him the big brown puppy dog eyes. The nail polish still hasn't come off. There was no telling where Shouri went off to.

"I'm hungry." Wolf huffed to his unwilling housemate.

"Untie me, and I'll make you a sandwich."

"Ok. Promise not to try to escape?"

"No, it's raining anyways, and I'm broke."

"Hmph. Fine. Lean over here." After he untied his prisoner, Yuuri opened the fridge, took out the turkey, sliced swiss, mustard, and a jar of sliced pickles.

He assembled the ingredients and the last was the pickle slices. "UNNNNNN!!!! HEERRRRRMMMMMM….."

"What's the hold up wimp?"

"I am not a wimp! I just can't open the pickle jar. It's impossible to open a new jar of pickles." he struggled a while before it was jerked out of his hands by the ever irritated Wolfram. He set it on the counter, went upstairs and got something, then calmly walked back into the kitchen.

"Um, Wolf, I wouldn't do tha-!" He used the flat edged of his sword to pry open the jar and handed it back to Yuuri.

"Wouldn't do what? Be a wimp? Too late for that." Yuuri glowed red and finished his sandwiches. They sat down to eat and watch Spongebob and make nasty comments about how stupid the show was.

"That was good. Thank you." Wolfram took the plates back into the kitchen as he saw the family do, and place them into the sink for cleaning.

Yuuri stretched out and propped his feet up on the coffee table, not noticing Wolfram inching towards him.

Yuuri: Come on, untie me! I made you a sandwich!

Wolf: It was good, and I said thanks.

Yuuri: I won't run away. I promise!

Wolf: I'll untie you for a kiss…

Yuuri: …

Wolf: Thought so wimp.

There you have it. Read and drop a review, and if you give me a suggestion, I might use it and dedicate a chapter to you. If you don't ask, you won't receive.


	4. Chapter 4

Thirty One Days of May

Chapter 3

Disclaimer: C'mon, really? Check the ff-ing prologue.

a/n: a challenge that my friends and I are doing for fun. I don't know if I've ranted about this yet, but I will now. Before I started writing this and was bouncing the idea off my friends, I was calling it Thirty Days of May. Not one of them noticed the mistake, either that or they were wanting me to make a dummy out of myself. So to Wolfram, CheyanneChika, and Stupidmusehatesme, XPPP!!!!

Lol enjoy the raspberries! Ok, this chapter is a combination of a suggestion from Melodyz07 and Yuuram2fangirl. One wants a family reunion, but I don't think that's do-able, and the other wants them to play twister with Murata, but he's back in Shin Makoku. So, I shall invite a cousin to play Twister and let the jealousy fly!

May 3rd

It was STILL raining outside the third day of their Sage imposed exile from home, and Wolfram was crawling the walls with boredom, and Yuuri was crawling the walls watching him. On top of that, Wolf STILL had pink nails and STILL refused to be alone with Mama for fear of his innocence.

"Yuu-chan! Your cousin Misaki is being dropped off by Bunny-chan. Be nice and keep him entertained while I go visit Mrs. Yamada." Miko leaned over the back of the couch and kissed Yuuri and a flustered Wolf on the foreheads and stepped out the door in time to say hello to Misaki.

"Hey guys! How's it going?" he was met with twin glares from a pair of emerald and sable eyes. "Whoa. Tense much?"

Wolfram stalked around the brown haired boy and eyed him up and down. "You're cute. Yuuri is MY fiance, so don't get any ideas." Misaki looked at him with wide eyes and gave a shrug in nonchalance.

"Whatever, dude. Hey! I brought Twister! Who wants to play? I bought it for Usagi-san and me to play naked with baby oil, but he won't, the spoiled sport." he opened his bag and pulled out the box with the game. He spread the mat and put the spinner together. "Okay. The rules are, every blue spun, Wolf takes off a piece of clothes. Every green spun, Yuu-chan takes something off and every yellow spun, I take something off."

They were playing for nearly 30 minutes and before long, Wolfram was down to his loaned boxers and nothing else.

Wolf: Are you sure you play this blindfolded? You two feel like you still have lots of clothes on, and you feel fuzzy.

Misaki and Yuuri: Oh yes, yes. We're all blindfolded. *snickers*

Yuuri: left hand blue!

Wolf: Heeeyyyy…. Wait a minute! If you're blindfolded, how can you see the arrow and what it's pointed to?!?

*front door opens and closes*

Shouma: Uummm, why is Wolfram almost naked and blindfolded? And why is he playing Twister with a German Shepherd wearing MY CLOTHES?!?!?

Wolf: GRRRRR!!!!!!

Misaki and Yuuri: BUAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

Yuuri: REVENGE IS ALL MINE!!!!

There you have it. Yuuri uses Misaki to exact his revenge. I know I might not have gotten Misaki's character, but I needed a cousin and he sounds cute. I hope you enjoyed this chapter Wolfram!


	5. Chapter 5

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Don't ask.

a/n: hey y'all. This is chapter 5 for May 4. Today's drabble comes to you from ladymatsuura and Miyuki Meiru. I've combined the idea of a trip to the arcade and an amusement park. It just seems natural. Alright giggety goo!

May 4

Today found the Shibuya family and their blonde cohort in the arcade of a family fun theme park of amusement by the name of Pochi's Park of Play. Shouri had slinked off to hover around the entrance to the ladies changing rooms, and the parents were playing a crane game. Well, Shouma was playing the crane trying to win Miko a stuffed teddy bear in a dress that was worth half of what he spent trying to win it.

Wolf and Yuuri were standing next to the Dance Dance Revolution machine waiting for their turn. Finally the kids got fed up with it and Yuuri pulled Wolfram up on the platform. "Which song do you want?" Yuuri asked kindly after putting his tokens in.

"What about the Maoh's Anthem? Or maybe Shinou's Requiem? My favourite is Voltaire's March On The Humans." Yuuri gave him an odd look before picking Super Drive.

"How about this one?"

"Whatever. I don't know how to do this anyways."

"You follow the light pattern and step on the corresponding arrow under your feet. Whoever wins gets to sleep in my bed, and the loser has to sleep on the couch."

"Deal, Wimp."

A few minutes later….

"I-I cannot believe I lost… you've never even played this before! Best two out of three!"

"Ok, but THIS time if I win, I get a kiss. Full on the lips WITH tongue!"

"Deal." they shook on it and picked another song at random. It ended up being the Speedycake Remix of Caramelldansen.

A few more minutes later….

"NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! REDO! REDO! REDO!!!"

"Nuh-uh. Pucker up."

"Now?"

Wolf pulled him into him by his shirt and kissed him hard. Yuuri tried to fight him off, but he found himself melting into it. He gasped when Wolf licked his lower lip and felt the blondes tongue slip into his mouth. He soon found that when he slid his against Wolf's, it created a pleasant tingle that he later would say turned him completely into a pouf.

Shouma: *clears throat* are you about finished?

Wolf: Just claiming my wager.

Yuuri: *face and ears burning*

Miko: SQUEEEEE!!!!!

Shouri: *drunk with lots of angry slap marks on face* My little brother is not gay!!!!

There you have it. I had a tough time on this one. It just did not want to get written. A kiss for Usa-chan. Consider it an early birthday present and a foreshadowing for the 16th. Lots of love. P.s, thanks to Chey for giving me the squee idea.


	6. Chapter 6

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 6

Disclaimer: still nuh-uh

a/n: a cute little story celebrating Mother's Day in Japan. The American Mother's Day is the 9th, but since this fic takes place in Japan, it only stands to reason that they celebrate it for their country. My thanks to melody07 for finding out the date and the proper gift for a Japanese mom. I hope she and my dear readers who know the traditions will forgive me my loose interpretations.

May 5

The smoke alarm was blaring as Shouma and Miko walked into the front door after a morning of shopping. When they saw the smoke, they ran into the kitchen and heard an intense coughed argument going on.

"What is going on here?" Shouma yelled to get the boys' attention. The two looked at them sheepishly and Yuuri replied,

"We were trying to cook Mom a mother's Day lunch, but this spoiled brat ruined it!"

"HEY!" Wolf cried in heated indignation. Miko gave a tittering, covered by a dainty hand over her mouth.

"The only thing I want is for you to put these on _including_ the accessories."

Wolf pouted and Yuuri looked in the bags and gave a yelp, "We are NOT wearing this stuff! NEVER EVER!!!"

Miko gave a sad sigh, "Well, if you won't, you won't. I guess I'll get the cleaning rags and bucket and get on my hands and knees to scrub the floor for my kind, loving, family. Even if it _is_ Mother's Day, I don't mind scrubbing the floor to make my family-" Shouma nudged his wife and she noticed that the boys were gone with the bags.

Upstairs…

Yuuri: I cannot believe she gave us the Mom Guilt.

Wolf: Stupid ribbons. Stupid wrappy dress.

Yuuri: It's called an obi and a kimono.

Wolf: I have pink nails again. I just got the old off…

Yuuri: Let's head downstairs. The sooner we give her what she wants, the sooner we can get out of these kimonos.

Downstairs in the family room…

Shouma and Miko waited till the boys were in the door and click! Click! Click! The flash bulbs went off nearly blinding poor Wolfram, and Yuuri was expecting it, so he knew to not look at the camera directly.

Late that night….

Miko was printing out the photos from earlier off of her digital camera. All the pictures showed two sullen boys in matching kimonos; white silk with red carnations, red obis, and matching red bows in their hair. The picture had the three of them together and all three had big smiles, just two of them seemed more forced than the last. The caption she typed on the bottom read, 'My sweet carnations. Mother's Day 2010.'

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there, both male and female.

And since I wrote one for the Japanese holiday, I'll not write one for the US.


	7. Chapter 7

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 7

Disclaimer: so not going there.

a/n: this idea is from uniquelyme91. It's just too cute not to do. Oh yes. I apologize for the last chapter being in bold. I tried to fix it, but I couldn't figure it out. So if anybody knows how to fix it, drop me a line. Just remember to draw it in crayon. Ok, this idea is from

May 6

Yuuri and Wolfram were in the changing room at the high school that Yuuri attends when he's on Earth, and as usual, they were arguing. It all started earlier in the day…

Wolf followed Yuuri out the door, up the street, and into the school, and them he finally made his presence known when Yuuri said hello to his classmate, Wakaba.

"HEY!!! YUURI IS MY FIANCEE!!! HANDS OFF BITCH!!!" Wolfram stormed up to them and jerked the black eyed boy away from the girl. She just stood there gaping after them.

Yuuri staggered after him and finally managed to get away from his iron grip. "That was- that's not- WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!?"

"I'm making sure no one steals MY fiancé! I have to protect you!" everybody was staring at them by this time, so Wolf made his claim. He grabbed the front of the shirt that Yuuri was wearing and pressed his lips to his. Yuuri pushed him away and stomped off wiping his mouth and trying to ignore the catcalls that followed after him.

"Wimp! We are not finished yet!" Wolfram ran after and cornered him in the gymnasium's locker room. He watched as Yuuri put on some ugly flowery shorts and grabbed a towel, trailed him to the swimming pool.

A rush of dread tightened his chest when Yuuri dove into the pool, leaving him on the side, staring with wide, green tear filled eyes. "YUURI!!!!" he dove in after him, and grabbed him, pulling him down as he sank. The blackness at the edge of his vision and took over his whole being.

Wolfram felt cool lips on his and felt the air being pushed into his mouth and down his throat, and he began to cough violently as water came pouring out of his lungs. He was helped to a sitting position by his rescuer. He was surprised to see it was Yuuri.

"You alright, Wolf?" he asked gently.

Wolfram hugged into his neck and sniffed, "I was so afraid you were going to leave me. I have never been so afraid to be left all alone."

A couple of hours later, both boys were in Yuuri's bed with a thick comforter covering them, and Wolfram was snuggled up to Yuuri, who for once, didn't seem to mind.

Miko sighed when she saw them spooning together when she came up to check on them. "Goodnight, boys." CLICK went the soft sound of a digital camera, unnoticed.

The sweet chapter of the story. I added Wolfram's request too, cause it just seemed a perfect way to end it. Lots of love all around.


	8. Chapter 8

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 8

Disclaimer: you wish

a/n: Today is my friend's Cheyanne's birthday. So therefore in honour of this prestigious occasion, let us all wish the old lady Happy Birthday today. Here's to you kid!

May 7

"Oh Yuu-chan, don't forget that today is the day you'll be taking Wolfie-chan to Chey-chan's birthday party." Miko reminded him for the millionth time that morning as she put his breakfast down in front of him.

"But Mom, she's so creepy! She wears all black and heavy makeup that makes her look like a zombie! I don't think Wolf wants to be around her." Yuuri gave him a longing look as if to say, 'please back me up on this.'

Wolf was still embarrassed and angry at waking up snuggled in the wimp's arms "No, I think it sounds like fun. I never been to an Earth party."

"Great! I laid your clothes out to put on. You have to be there at noon for the birthday lunch."

Noon….

"Dammit! You won't like her at all. This chick is scary and creepy, and you won't like her at all."

"Let me be the judge of who and what I like. I'm not your wife yet, wimp." Yuuri grumbled something about not being a wimp and rang the doorbell to his classmate's house.

"Oh hello, boys. Come in. The party is in the basement entertainment room." The nice lady reminiscent to the scary mom from the beaver show opened the door and ushered them downstairs where the heavy sounds of Der Schniffenheim, a western Heavy metal band.

"Here we go…" Yuuri murmured as they stepped into the dark room.

Cheyanne walked over to them and looked them over with a critical eye. "Your outfits look like your mommies picked them out. Hey guys! We have some daisies in need of some gothification. I have the perfect outfits fro you, and you have to wear them, because it's my birthday."

After being made over to look like an emotionally disturbed couple of teenagers, Yuuri and Wolf looked into the full length mirror on the back of the door. Yuuri was wearing black pants with big legs and a tight black fishnet shirt and a leather collar with spikes. His hair had been spiked and the tips sprayed with silver hair paint for the extra effect. Wolfram was wearing leather hip hugger pants that he was sure he couldn't sit down in with a sleeveless turtle neck shirt and gloves that went halfway up almost to his shoulders. He had heavy eyeliner that made his emerald eyes stick out even more and Cheyanne had spray colored his hair to a glossy black and spiked it on the top.

"There. Now we can get going."

"Wait, what about lunch?" Yuuri was hungry and wanted some party food.

"We can eat at the mall. We're going to hiss at people and growl at them if they look at us. Then, we can get a pizza on the way home."

Yuuri was horrified that someone he knew could see him. He gave a gallant effort to stop them, "What about opening your presents? Don't you want to see what you got?"

"Nope, don't care." she really did, but she liked messing with people.

They went to the mall and took up their goth poses and began to hiss and growl at people if they looked at them. Yuuri eventually calmed down and Wolf was enjoying it so much, he gave a rather nasty sneer and made a little boy wet himself and start to cry.

"You mean kids!" the mom screeched with her annoying mom voice, "You have no right to be so mean!"

Cheyanne flipped her off and answered, "Drop dead, bitch. Why don't you run up an alley and holler fish?" She gave a parting growl and they all stalked off.

That night after a good night hug to Cheyanne, the guys went home still dressed in their goth regalia. Miko screamed when she saw them come in, but soon noticed it was just Yuuri and Wolf.

Back at her house, Cheyanne opened her gift from Yuuri and Wolf and found a teddy bear dressed in a ballerina's tuu-tuu. She snuggled it to her chest and sat on her desk chair to e-mail her weirdo friend, AirKnitter.

Email: You suck ass. You do know that right? Oh well. Bye!

She fell asleep soon after that with the ballerina bear hugged to her.

There you go! Chapter 8. I just had to pick on her a bit. She's not as mental as I made her out to be, and we have a friendly hatred going on right now. Love and huggles!!


	9. Chapter 9

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 9

Disclaimer: oh really, now. Get the hint!

a/n: I need all of my lovely readers to review more and send in those ideas. I love it when all of you boost my ego, so hop to it! Chop chop. This chapter is really not anything, it's just a filler for today, cause my idea well has dried up, and I forgot the name of the nice reviewer who has said they have lots of ideas. If you would drop me a message, I'm up for any story ideas. Thanks for reading and tell me what you think!

May 8

Yuuri lay there on his back panting as a golden haired, emerald eyed angel kissed down his torso, stopping at the top of the pyjama pants. When he started to move higher, he gave a groan of disappointment at the loss. Yuuri tried to push the blonde head down, but he got his pinkie bit for his troubles.

"Ooohh… Wolf, do something, please! Stop teasing me!" He begged desperate for some friction. Finally, he reached his hand into the pants and began to move in a slow motion, making Yuuri shiver as a delicious sensation crawled up his spine. The moaning coming from his pink lips spurred Wolf on and he increased his pressure and speed on his member.

"Oh, oh Wolf! Pant faster! Faster! Ahh, yes! OHH WOLFRAM!!" he came hard into Wolf's hand and laid there trying to catch his breath as Wolf licked his fingers clean.

"Wimp, WIMP!! Wake up!"

"Huh, whuh? Whas goin on?" Yuuri sat up and blushed as he felt the wetness from his dream in his pants.

"You were moaning and calling my name. I'm trying to sleep, dammit, so let me sleep without calling out my name."

"Um, Wolf? We need to change the sheets."

"Why?"

"I kindofhadawetdream."

Wolfram took a minute to translate Yuuri-speak into a passable language. "Ohhhh. I get it now." he Hmphed and grabbed his pillow and went downstairs and onto the couch and left Yuuri to clean up the remnants of his nocturnal emissions.

Afterwards, he lay there thinking about the dream, wondering what it meant. Was he really thinking about Wolfram that way? He did kiss him like twice. Did that mean he was gay? He had to admit to himself that his lips were soft like he imagined a girl's to be. He hadn't protested about being called his fiancé, just being called a wimp.

After thinking a bit longer, Winking, Blinking and Nod finally claimed him and sailed him into dreamland for the remainder of the night.

There you have it. A filler chapter with a little bit of lime, just for my beloved readers. Now a quick question: Should Yuuri and Wolf 'go all the way' on the last day of May before going back to Shin Makoku? Do you want me to raise the rating to an M? if you don't tell me, then I won't know, right? So you know what to do, click the lovely review button, and tell me what you want.


	10. Chapter 10

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 10

Disclaimer: still so nuh-uh.

a/n: ok, this chapter was suggested by the super-nice uniquelyme91, and therefore is dedicated to this good reviewer. On to more important business; my readers have spoken: there will be lemons at the end of the month! Can you hear the heavenly choir singing in the sky? Till then, it will remain a strong T. Huggles!!

May 9

Shouri staggered into the kitchen that day after 12 p.m. still hungover from the big party the night before and the bright sunshine of the day wasn't helping. Neither was the heated yelling match between his baby brother and the blonde hellcat that had announced himself as his future bother-in-law.

"I'm telling you for the last time, wimp, when we get married, I'M the man in our relationship!" Wolf jabbed him in the chest to punctuate his point.

"Are you saying that I'm a girly-man? I'll be the man, especially seeing as how I'M the Maoh of Shin Makoku."

Their yelling escalated to a screaming math, making Shouri's hangover worse and worse, which in turn was making his eyebrow twitch till he couldn't take the pounding in his head anymore.

"WILL YOU TWO SHUT THE HELL UP?!?" he took a deep, calming breath and he got an idea. He got a wonderful, nasty, awful idea. "Let's settle this argument once and for all. We'll have a manliness contest. Whoever scores the most points, wins. It's as simple as that. This contest will have 3 parts. Best 2 out of three wins."

Yuuri looked at Wolfram, and his gaze was met. "Agreed."

At the store….

"Ok, the first contest. This one will test if you will do anything to help somebody." Yuuri smirked at the sound of it, "You will both go into the store and _ask_ the clerk where the super absorbent tampons are, and then you will _buy them_ and decline a bag. You will then carry them on the city bus and ride it home and give them to our mother."

Wolfram could see nothing wrong with this, mainly because he had no clue what they were used for, and he couldn't understand what the deep blush on Yuuri's face was all about. The two boys went into the store and Wolfram strolled up to the counter and got the clerk's attention.

"I would like a box of super abortion stamps ons, please." The clerk looked at him with an amused expression and leaned under the counter and pulled out a book of stamps. "Is this what you're looking for?"

"I guess so. How much currency do you require for this thing?"

"500 yen, please."

Yuuri had already purchased the box and ran out the door to catch the bus for the short ride to his house.

Later at home…

Wolf was extremely angry at losing the very first challenge. He demanded a redo. "Ok, the next challenge is easy. Whoever can hop on one leg the longest will win. Wolf was happy about this one, cause his military training required him to have perfect balance. "Ready, steady, GO!"

They began hopping and glaring at each other with malicious intent. After nearly an hour of tiring hopping, they were starting to feel the exhaustion. Finally with a loud WHUMP! Yuuri fell over panting. Wolf collapsed covered with sweat with his chest heaving. "I win WIMP!"

"Not a wimp, BRAT!!"

"Very good. Now for the final test: you will both clean up the kitchen, vacuum the living room, and wipe down the windows. A true man has no problem helping his wife with the chores around the house, right?"

Wolf ran into the kitchen and used super Mazoku speed to clean it up while Yuuri ran around the living room vacuuming at a furious pace. Then they both finished wiping the windows and stopped in front of Shouri.

"Well? Who won?" Shouri looked thoughtful for a moment.

"I am. I'm more manlier. I got you to get Mom's tampons, and I made you clean up the house, all of which were my chores. Thanks!" shouri gloated over his triumph over the two younger guys.

"So then why did you make us hop on one foot?" Yuuri asked with a confused look on his face.

"Cause I wanted too. It was very funny."

He walked off laughing at the boys and relishing the fact that he got his chores done for free and had time to nap for the party that night.

Yuuri: We are so gonna get his ass back.

Wolfram: Totally. Nobody treats us like that. Asshole.

As always, thanks for reading. leave a review for me so I know how I'm doing. Oh, Happy Mother's Day to all the big mothers out there.

p.s. My request line is still open if you want a chapter dedicated to you.


	11. Chapter 11

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 11

Disclaimer: Not going there today.

a/n: I'm feeling super lazy, so today's story will have no dialogue till the very end. It's not dedicated to anybody in particular, cause it's my own idea. Ok, so I stole the prompt from Stupidmuse_hatesme. She got the prompt from somebody she knows. The prompt: Frown.

May 10

Wolfram finished strapping on the safety gear and his roller blades, and tried to stand up before landing on his rear end with a big thump. Giving a big frown that would rival Gwendal's he stood back up and managed to push a ways down the Shibuyas' walkway, heading for the public sidewalk.

He made it after falling another two times and right after getting on the sidewalk, the wheels on his right foot hit a crack and he took another big tumble to the hard ground. 'how in the hell is this crap supposed to protect me? Falling still hurts like all hell!' was the annoyed thoughts going through his mind like a teasing mantra.

Wolfram saw his stupid fiancé up ahead of him moving at a leisurely pace, and he called out to him, but instead of waiting, he sped up! Setting his jaw into a fierce look of determination, he put his helmeted head down and started to push while thinking 'one, two! One, two!' and before he knew it, he was gaining quickly on Yuuri.

He went sailing by him and noted the look of complete surprise there, unfortunately, he started to go faster and faster downhill.

"WOLFRAM!!!! USE THE BRAKES!!!"

"HOW?!?" he had no clue where the brakes were.

He heard the wimp yell something else, but he found his own way to stop which involved toppling a police officer who was writing a double parked car a ticket.

"OOFFF!!!" the breath was knocked out of both of them. After regaining his wind, the officer looked down at the angelic face with the blazing green eyes laying on the top of him. "Are you okay? That was a nasty crash."

"I'm fine. I didn't know how to stop. My uh, _friend_ didn't tell me how too. I'm Wolfram von Bielefeld, by the way." he gave a quick flutter of his eyelashes.

"Umm, I'm officer Sousuke Sagara." he felt his face going redder than before if it was even possible.

Yuuri came to a halt at the scene of the crash and was watching the exchange, and he noticed something; Wolfram was _flirting_ with the cop! How could that be? He was _his_ devoted fiancée, right?

Something inside him snapped and he fought to keep the surge of betrayal and anger down. He skated up to the oblivious couple, reached down and pulled Wolfram to his skates. He steadied him and jerked him into a painful, bruising kiss. The poor cop just sat there in his disappointment.

"You belong to ME wolfram von Bielefeld. Do not forget it." Yuuri's voice had gone down a few octaves and his hair had grown longer. He grabbed his hand and then started to pull Wolf home. Later when Wolf asked him, he claimed to not know what happened earlier.

Wolf just frowned and inside, he was soaring, glad that the maoh had claimed him in front of a stranger.

The officer was rather cute, though….

Alrighty then. I believe somebody suggested they go skating, but I cannot remember who. Chocolate chip cookies to whoever can tell me who the cop was and from what anime he's out of.


	12. Chapter 12

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 12

Disclaimer: OY! SHADDUP ALREADY!!!

a/n: ok, so yesterday's chapter was a lazy one, but then again, so is today's. today we find out why it's a bad idea to piss off Yuuri and Wolf. Enjoy reading, cause I enjoyed writing it. It's based off the day before yesterdays chapter.

May 11

Shouri woke up that morning, thankfully with no hangover. He begged off the previous night's party to give his body a chance to not wake up with bad heartburn and massive indigestion. He slid his feet into his padded house shoes and when he took a step, he fell flat on his face with a huge WHUMP!!

"What the hell…??" he looked back and tried to pick his house shoes up, but they were nailed to the floor!! He limped into the bathroom for his shower and took a good look around to make sure nothing was amiss. He stepped into the tub and turned on the hot tap and gave an unmanly squeal when the shower head sprayed him with cold water.

After finally getting the water hot like he likes, Shouri let the spray calm him down and run over his body. He grabbed the washcloth and put some body wash onto it and ran it all over his chest, arms, and legs. Then he grabbed his shampoo and ran it all through his hair. He shaved while he let his hair and body soak with the lather resting on him.

He rinsed off and then turned off the water and stepped out onto the black rug to look into the mirror. He blinked and wiped the condensation off the reflective surface and screamed in unholy anger.

"YYYYUUUUUUURRRRRRIIIIIIIII!!!!!!! WWWWWWOOOOOLLLLLLFFFFFRRRRRAAAAAAMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!" he thought he damaged his voice box from the sheer volume of his angry screaming.

Downstairs, the two boys heard the shrieking and hurriedly made themselves scarce for the rest of the day. Miko was sitting at the kitchen table when her eldest son stomped in looking for the traitors to pound on. She took one look at him in nothing but his bath towel and burst out in large guffaws, tears soon streaming down her face. She finally caught her breath enough to ask, "Sho-chan, gasp, what happened?"

"Yuuri and Wolfram did this! First, the nail my slippers to the floor, then they put hair remover in my body wash, so now I have streaks of missing hair all over my body!! Oh, and they also put hair bleach in my damn shampoo, so now I'm a streaky blonde slash brunette!" he sat down and Miko poured him some coffee and he put his sugar and cream into it. When he took a sip, he spluttered it out of his mouth, gagging on the taste.

"THEY PUT SALT IN THE SUGAR BOWL!!!!"

Outside the kitchen door, the culprits stood laughing quietly. They shook hands and were supremely proud of their ability to work together when the occasion called for it.

Alright. There you have it. Revenge on Shouri for their humiliation. Review and let me know what you guys think.


	13. Chapter 13

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I wish you'd just give it up.

a/n: ok. Yesterday's story was suggested by uniquleyme91, but I forgot to dedicate, so here it is. May 12 is officially dedicated to you. Today's story is dedicated to the same lovely reviewer. It's just too cute to pass up.

May 12

Yuuri opened his eyes and the first thing he noticed was that he was in his huge four poster canopied bed in the royal chambers in Blood Pledge castle. He looked over to Wolfram's side and the blonde was not there.

After dressing and brushing his teeth, he set out on his mission for the day: Find Murata and beat the ever-loving crap out of him. Luckily for him, his target was right in front of him. With a squeak of surprise, Murata turned and ran away with Yuuri right behind him.

Yuuri kept running, faster and faster! Murata kept well ahead of him, which was a surprise, especially since one was athletic, the other a studious bookworm. They flew through several closed doors and through the kitchens. He finally snagged the back of the Not-So-Great Sage's shirt and tackled him to the floor. He sat on top of him and shook him roughly.

"Yuuri! YUURI! Yu-y-u-rri-!" his voice was quaking from the abuse he was suffering.

Murata gave a painful punch to his jaw and Yuuri grunted and rolled off of him.

"You stupid-stupid, WIMP!" he was in shock mainly because Murata sounded like Wolfram.

"Murata?"

"Mur- MURATA? You stupid cheating bastard!" Wolf jumped out of bed, leaving a bewildered Yuuri behind, looking at the door that was just slammed.

'wow, what a realistic dream that was.' Yuuri rolled over and relished in having the bed to himself.

Back in Shinou's Shrine…

The Great Sage woke up with a start and his hand went to his throat which felt bruised. "ow."

And that concludes May 12's story. I need more ideas to keep the chapters coming. Oh yes, and I need reviews to make it all worth while. Make me happy, feed the author your yummy reviews.


	14. Chapter 14

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 14

Disclaimer: are you stalking me or something?

a/n: today's story is a bit late. I had a lot of things to do, but no worries! I'm posting this before midnight, so THERE! XP this one is dedicated to my good friend and beta (but not with this story) Usa~chan!

May 13

Wolf and Yuuri were left alone in the house while his parents went out to wine and dine some big banking investor from overseas. Shouri was as usual at a college party, and this time went with an overnight bag slung over his shoulder, so he'd be gone till the gods know when.

Around nine p.m., Wolfram turned to look at Yuuri, "Wimp, I want some of those sweet pastry filled with the goo inside."

"You mean a snack cake?"

"I guess so. Can I have one?"

"We don't have any. Sorry."

After being stared down for nearly a minute, Yuuri caved with a sigh. "Let's go to the store then." They put on their shoes and left a note in case the parents should come home before them and went out the door.

Yuuri led them to the corner store that his mother sends him to if she needs something spur of the moment and opened the door for Wolf, who was slightly afraid of them. He picked up a small basket although he didn't think they'd need it for just a snack cake.

"Yuuri look! The tea is on sell! Oh! And look at that!"

Yuuri groaned, recognizing the symptoms of a person who obsesses over sales. His mother is infinitely worse, or so he thought. "Wolf, why do we need paprika? You don't even cook! Hey, why are you getting a plunger? What is that?"

"Dunno, but it's on sale half off! I don't know how they can sell something that's missing half of it's case, but oh well."

Poor Yuuri was forced to carry five bags laden down with stuff he didn't know was buyable in a convenience store.

When they got home, Wolfram was digging through the bags and looked up at his fiancé, "We forgot the snack cakes. We need to go back."

With a loud groan, he dragged Yuuri back to the store and picked up a basket. "Yuuri look at these little springy things on the wood!"

Yuuri didn't waste his breath on replying. He ended up lugging another 3 bags home. He dropped the stuff on the living room floor and let Wolfram dig through his stuff.

"Uhh, Yuu-chan?" he could tell by the use of his pet name that it wasn't a good thing about to come from the blonde's mouth, so he beat him to the punch.

"Let me guess, Wolfie-chan, you forgot to get your snack cakes yet again." A golden nod of confirmation, "Come with me a second." Yuuri pulled him up and led him to the basement door and opened it. He turned on the light and gestured for Wolf to go inside. He shut the door behind him and locked it.

"Let me out you wimp!" the banging on the door meant that Yuuri would be in for it later.

30 minutes later….

Yuuri came home to a quiet house and unlocked the door. Wolf was propped against it and fell in a heap at his feet. "Here are your cakes." Wolf stood up and took the box and gave Yuuri a big glomp.

"I guess I'll forgive you this time, wimp."

Yuuri let his fiancée kiss him on the lips. He was still a tad uncomfortable, but he was trying to work through it. I mean, why bother trying to save his reputation when everybody knew he was engaged to a hot guy?

That night…

Shouma: Miko? Why is there mousetraps on the table? Where did this plunger come from? What is this crap?

Miko: I don't know, dear. Oohh look! Pink ribbons!

There you go Usa! All for you. Ok guys. I'm seriously running out of ideas. Help me out and send me some suggestions. Review too…come on, you know you want too…


	15. Chapter 15

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 15

Disclaimer: I see bad disclaimer jokes…

a/n: this chapter is dedicated to CheyanneChika who suggested it to me, but I forgot until I remember that I forgot to remember it. So, here it is.

May 14

Yuuri was hungry. He wanted something, but was unsure what it was. He felt restless and almost painful, sitting outside in the bright sunshine, watching Wolf and Mama tending the prized roses and the small herb garden. He licked his chapped lips for the hundredth time in a five minute span. The stinging of them brought him out of his little world of tiny thoughts.

Wolfram heard his fiancé stand up and watched him go in the back door that lead into the kitchen. He murmured something about getting a cool drink for himself and Mama and followed Yuuri inside.

"Yuuri, why are you standing there with the ridgermerator door open? You know Father hates it when you do that, cause it wastes the eleketricity."

"Hmm, I'm craving something, but I have no clue what I want. I think I want something sweet, but I'm not sure." he said, his eyes never leaving the 'ridgermeraotr's' contents. He really loved the innocent way Wolf mangled his words.

Wolf stood there in deep thought, contemplating what Yuuri just said. He faintly recalled something similar, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. He reached past the black haired boy and got the yellow drink out of the ridge and poured 3 glasses and gave one to Yuuri. He took out the other 2 and handed one to Mama before the memory that was teasing his mind hit him full force.

"YUURIII! He dropped his glass and ran inside, leaving a very confused woman behind. Wolfram found the king eating an unusual sandwich that consisted of onions, peanut butter and pickles with cinnamon sprinkles on it.

"Are you pregnant?"

Yuuri's eyes got wide at the question, "Pregnant? What the hell are you talking about?"

"You are having odd cravings, so that means that you're pregnant. I remember Nicola doing the same, don't you? But, we haven't had sex yet, so that…means…you-you…CHEATER!" the full implications struck Wolfram straight in the heart at the thought that his beloved Yuuri might be pregnant with someone else's baby.

He ran upstairs and locked the bedroom door, slipped down to the floor and began to sob his heart out. How could he do that to him? He loved Yuuri with all his heart, and he went off and betrayed him with some whore monger.

He heard a soft knocking on the door and an even softer voice call out to him. "Wolf, come on, open the door." he was answered with muted sobs and knew that Wolf was pressing his hand to his mouth to quiet the noise. "I'm not pregnant, I swear. I'm just having weird summer cravings, because I'm just growing, I promise that I have never had sex with anybody. Besides, if I ever do, then _I'll _be the top, and _you'll_ be the one who has the babies, ok?"

Wolf opened the door and gave him a teary smile and pressed a salty, snotty kiss to Yuuri's lips. "Ok, it's a deal. I am tougher than you are, so I'll be able to deal with the pains of childbirth."

Yuuri still wasn't comfortable with this relationship yet, but he felt himself becoming closer to his spoiled little Wolf cub, and he was finally ready to move a bit further.

"Hey Wolf, let's go out on a date tomorrow, ok?"

"Okay. I've never been on a date before. I can't wait."

Tomorrow, we shall see where they go, and what they do on their first date. Ok, time for a bit of Q & A. do you think I'm rushing their relationship too much? If you do, let me know and I'll make the date a complete disaster. If you don't, then I'll make it a good one, so it's up to you, my lovely readers. The fate of their future love rests in your hands. So review, review, review! Hope you liked it! Let me know one way or another!


	16. Chapter 16

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 16

Disclaimer: homina homina, NI and Weebarb!

a/n: due to the overwhelming votes from all my reviewers, I shall not make their first date a miserable disaster. Have any of you seen Disaster Date on MTV? It's so funny what they put these morons through. You should check it out sometime. It comes on almost everyday at 5 pm US central time. This chapter was rolling around in my head for a while ever since uniquelyme91 sent me the idea. I bounced it off Usa and she added to the funny, and I feel bad for forgetting whose idea it was for them to go to a movie. Sorry. I try to take notes of who sends me what, but I guess I didn't write it down. Bad Knitter, BAD! Oh well. On with the show!

May 15

Yuuri was waiting downstairs for his fiancée to join him so he could take him on their first date. He was nervous, and his sweaty hands were evidence of such. He didn't love Wolf yet, but he hoped that with time, he would. He also wanted to be certain that Wolfram wanted him for him, not the maoh for being the maoh.

"I'm ready to go, Yuuri" a timid voice said, bringing him out of his reverie.

"Wow, Wolf. You're looking nice." he held his hand out to the blushing prince and they made for the door.

"Wait, Yuuri. Here." Yuuri nearly died when his dad handed him a condom. Wolf grabbed it out of his hands and opened it out of curiosity.

"What's if for, Father?" he asked with his naivety. The only response was a snorting laugh from the parents.

"Let's go. Now!" Yuuri grabbed the rubber contraceptive from his hands and dropped it on the floor and pulled him out the door.

They went into a fast food joint and Yuuri ordered a fried chicken dinner for both of them. They sat down after filling their cups with coke and Dr. Pepper. (a/n don't know if Japan has those drinks, but it's my story. So tough cheese if they don't.)

The number on the receipt was called and Yuuri got their tray of food. When he sat it down in front of the blonde, the heard an exclamation of outrage from the pink lips. "How can you eat this? It's totally barbaric! The chicken is the most intelligent of the domesticated poultry and prized for it's plumage. I refuse to partake."

'Crap. I forgot about that detail.' He desperately thought of a way to salvage the date. He was starving, though. 'Taco Bell!'

He tossed to sacred domesticated poultry into the bin and he and Wolf went to the Taco Bell across the street. The sat down to eat the crunch wraps and tacos which the blonde fell in love with.

Their next stop on their date was the cinema to watch a movie. Yuuri ordered more soda and a box of junior mints and popcorn for his date, and for him, popcorn and twizzlers.

After they were seated and the lights dimmed, Yuuri put his arm on the rest, but Wolf wanted it. A short struggle ensued that ended with a chocolate candy being mashed on the brunette's white shirt. He soon found his lap full with a trembling Wolf, as the previews had startled him.

He settled down and Yuuri put the 3D glasses on his face and motioned for Wolf to followed suit. The first scene of the movie had a zombie hoard coming at the camera, and with the glasses, made it look even more real.

Wolf shoved Yuuri's head down to the floor and leaped on the top of the seat to a chorus of "SIT DOWN! DOWN IN FRONT!" he climbed over the rows of the movie goers with Yuuri close behind, snatching and grabbing at him. Wolf didn't have a sword, so he grabbed a crutch from a guy who had a broken leg and proceeded to brandish it.

Unfortunately, the usher had at that time chosen to make his presence known and caught the arm rest of the crutch in the gut. "OOMPH!" down he went in a heap.

It took 8 grown men to finally subdue the raging Mazoku, and none got away injury free. They were escorted out of the cinema with the strictest instructions to never return, on pain of prosecution, and the nice police officer, Sousuke Sagara took them home.

That night after explaining to his parents what the hell happened, and getting Wolf's point of view, they marked it off as his lack of knowledge of the human world as a whole.

Yuuri decided to try another date that wouldn't be quite so noisy and crowded for everyone's safety. When he was getting ready for bed, he saw Wolf hide a taco wrapper in his 'memory box' that he was taking home to Shin Makoku to show his friends and family what he did on Earth. He knew he'd do it again to make him smile.

There you have it. Not quite a disaster, but not mushy gooey either. Drop a review and tell me about it. You know you want to, right? C'mon, do it. Review.

Loves to you!


	17. Chapter 17

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 17

Disclaimer: I don't know what you people want from me.

a/n: ok. Today's story is an idea that came from yukinothekoneko, who brought it to my attention that Wolfie's birthday is in the spring. Ergo, I hereby proclaim today Wolfram's birthday in the name of the powers that be! However, it is also my good friend's birthday too, so Happy Birthday, kiddo! Drop a line to Wolfram von Bielefeld's profile and wish her a good one. This chapter is dedicated to you.

May 16

"Wolf, did I hear you right? Today is your birthday? _Today, _today?" Yuuri felt a little bad he didn't know.

"Yes. Today is my birthday. I am eighty-five."

"SQUEEEE! You're good looking for your age Wolfie-chan! What's your secret?"

Wolf looked at Mama and replied, "Hard work, a Spartan lifestyle, and finding your spout of happiness. Plus I'm a pureblood Mazoku, so that helps."

Miko skipped into the kitchen to make a big cake with lots of fluffy pink icing and cream cheese like she knew the blonde liked.

After the cake was baked and frosted, Miko asked Shouri to put on 16 candles. She decided that it would be more flattering to someone so old than to have 85.

"Who is it for?"

"Wolfie-chan, honey. It's his birthday today."

"I'll be right back. I have more candles in my room from last year."

He went upstairs and dug in the box under his bed for the extra candles, and then went back downstairs, grinning like a cow eating cactus. He stuck them in the middle of the cake above the standard Happy Birthday, Wolfie-chan.

""Happ-ee birthday dear Woollfffraaammm… Happ-ee birthdaaaayyyyy…..toooooo…..yooouuuuuuu!""

He looked at his pink cake, unsure of what was expected of him. "Now what?"

"Blow out the candles after you make a wish, of course!"

"What is the reasoning behind this endeavour? What do I wish for?"

"Wish for whatever you want, just don't tell anybody, or it won't come true."

Sounded easy, right? There's only one thing the blonde prince wants: him and Yuuri to be happy together, living like a cosy family of armadillos with their family.

He gave a sappy grin and gave a blow, but when they all didn't go out, he panicked, grabbing the bottle of soda and pouring it all over it pink cake to salvage his wish.

The Shibuya all stood there looking at the ruined mess, gawking at the blonde. Wolfram walked over to Yuuri and said, "I can't wait for my wish to come true." they all watched him walk off, singing the birthday song to himself like nothing was wrong.

'I still fail to see the point of that foolishness, but if it helps me get my wimp, I'll put lots of fires out.'

Happy birthday girl! I do not expect anybody to get the armadillo joke at all. And don't bother asking me, cause I am under a confidentiality clause not to say anything. Suffice it to say that it was brought up at like 2 in the morning, and it made me laugh really hard. As usual, review please! Huggles!


	18. Chapter 18

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 18

Disclaimer: still looking for one? Too bad.

a/n: today's chapter is a suggestion by I forget. Once again, I have failed to write something down. It's just so cute, and it seemed something that they would do after the disastrous date and birthday party. I would like to apologize to the two people who wanted a cute and sweet date, but the overwhelming majority said no. plus, my friend Usa held a gun to my head and demanded me to slow down. *looks behind her* Ummm…what I _meant_ to say was, Usa gave me 'constructive criticism' on how to do that chapter. Ok? Will you put the gun away? Thank you, my best friend in the whole world. Love you lots! Whew. Close call there.

May 17

That afternoon after helping Mama clean up the house, Wolf and Yuuri took off to the mall. They decided to see if Chey-chan was around so they could say hell. After looking in all the emo girl's usual dark corners, they gave it up.

"Yuuri, I want some cream ice."

"You mean 'ice cream'?"

"Yeah. Can we get some please? I like the strawberry in pink."

Yuuri thought that idea sounded good, and so he lead the hungry blonde to the food court.

"Hey blondie. What can I get you?" the vendor asked, giving Wolf a rather rakish smile.

Wolf wasn't paying him any mind and replied, "I would like a pink cream ice with an edible holder, please."

After a questioning look in his companion, Yuuri translated from Wolf-speak. "He means a strawberry ice cream in a cone, please." he wasn't liking the looks the vendor was throwing at his fiancée.

"Sure. Coming up." Yuuri wandered over to the menu after giving Wolf the money for his cone while he tried to decide what he wanted. "Here you go, cutie pie. Tell you what, give me a kiss, and it's on the house."

Wolf just stood there gaping at the man, unable to answer in his surprise and indignation. The brunette boy had heard, however and was outraged. "Do not talk to him that way, asshole!" the threw the coins at the vendor and swiped the cone from his hand and stomped away, dragging Wolfram behind him.

He drew him to a bench and they sat down so Wolf could eat the ice cream. "Thank you, wimp. I didn't know how to respond to that jerk." he began to lick the sweet and frozen treat.

"I'm sorry he said that to you, and stop calling a wimp. I did just rescue you."

"Hmm, I guess so. So do you want a lick?"

Yuuri leaned over and gave his lips a lick to clean the pink drippings off the blonde's face. He gave a big dopey grin and took a bite out of the cone. "I don't care for strawberry, but it tastes even better on your lips."

A bright red blush crept up Wolfram's face, and Yuuri was certain that the heat would melt the cold snack. When he was done, they walked home, ready to cuddle on the couch and watch Gravitation and then Junjou Romantica.

Wolf: Yuuri?

Yuuri: yes?

Wolf: the guy on this show looks like Misaki-san.

Yuuri: oh yeah. I forgot to tell you, my cousin is an actor.

Wolf: Oh. Ok. That's nice.

There is chapter 18. I hoped y'all enjoyed it. Make sure to review and tell me all about it. Oh yes, we have a late entry into our challenge. The new addition is Yukinthekoneko Frilly Pink Night Gowns and Band-aids. Check it out to see how you like it. It's another KKM fic. Ciao!


	19. Chapter 19

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 19

Disclaimer: lalalaa! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

a/n: today I decided to do something totally different with my story. I wrote this by myself, so today's chapter is dedicated to AirKnitter! WOOT! Go me!

May 18

Wolfram was left at home alone today. Father was at work, Shouri-nii was in class, and Mama and Yuuri went to see a den-tist whatever that was. He had chipped a tooth or some such nonsense. Back home, he'd just have Gisela heal it and be done with it. He began to get really lonely after the first hour with no one there.

He watched the felly-vixen, but that soon grew dull. He used a dust rag to wipe the shelves and tables down for dust with the slick spray stuff that reeks of lemons, and he was done with that too soon. He put the dishes up in the kitchen and took out a soda and sat out back to drink it at the patio table.

Then, he saw it. In Father's garden shed resided a machine that he's seen his fiancé and Shouri riding on that shortened the grass in the yard. He went over to it and sat on it, trying to remember how the other two made it go. 'Oh yeah, they turn a key.' he looked at the ignition and was glad to see it was in the hole.

With a deft turn to it, the machine roared to life, and Wolf was pleased with himself for making the noise happen. Now all he needed to do was figure out how to make it go.

After pushing buttons and pedals, and pulling levers, the roaring monster shot out of the shed, and Wolf ducked right before getting his head knocked off. All he could do was hang on for dear life as he and the machine tore around the backyard, ploughing into any and everything in the way.

With a BAM!, he crashed into the table and chairs, sending them flying every which where only to double back and chew them up with the blades and spit them out the other side in mangled pieces.

With a shout, Wolf cut the wheel hard to the left and to his growing horror, he completely demolished his future mother-in-law's prized roses.

He finally jumped from the screaming machine, and in doing so, it cut off with the safety trigger. He stood up, and looked all around him at the chaos he instrumented with his wild ride round the yard. He calmed down enough to push the green monster inside the shed, and he left it as he found it.

Two hours later, Yuuri and Miko came home to a red faced, guilt ridden Wolfram.

"Are you alright. Wolfie-chan?" Miko asked in concern.

"Yes, Mama. I'm ok."

"Ok, I'm just worried about you. Let me make us some sandwiches and lemonade to eat outside. Yuu-chan gets pudding. His poor mouth is really sore."

Wolf couldn't hide the inevitable and followed them out back to the den of destruction. "What in the world happened here?" Miko asked in shock as she looked at what looked like a battle ground.

Wolf was about to reply when he was engulfed in a big hug from the human woman, "You poor thing! It must have been so frightening for you! I'll bet you were so terrified when that tremor hit, and we weren't here with you! What on earth did you do?"

He could not believe his luck! He had gotten off with no consequences. The black haired boy was too out of it from the drugs to really care about anything except the faeries that seemed to be circling his head.

"I was afraid, but then I remembered what Yuuri said about the doorframes. I am sorry about your yard. I feel horrible…"

And he did, but he was too embarrassed to say anything.

Later that night, Shouma called his home owner's insurance and made a claim for the earth quake's destruction in his yard.

Wolf climbed into bed next t a snoring Yuuri and gave him a peck on the lips before snuggling in to sleep.

Ahhh… how sweet was that ending? I love cute things. One of my reviewers said I was too nice, to which I reply, yes. Yes I am. This whole fic over all is for Usa's birthday month and she likes nice and cute, so there you go. Love all around. Plus, I can't bear to hurt Wolfie-puu. He goes through so much already. As always, read and review. Huggles!


	20. Chapter 20

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 20

Disclaimer: no gottie, so shove off!

a/n: today is dedicated to my good friend Usa who gave me the idea. It's just so cute and after the last chapter, I thought that it would fit in right here just fine.

May 19

Wolfram awoke that morning and after dressing went downstairs to join Mama and Yuuri who were cooking breakfast.

"Morning Wolfie-chan! What do you want for breakfast this morning?"

"Grrrr." he wasn't fully awake yet and was in no mood for morning conversation. "I guess just some coffee and a pot-tarp."

"Pop-tart."

"That is what I said, wimp. Pot-tarp." Mama giggled and put the toaster warmed pastries on a plate and set it down with the coffee.

"I am not a wimp."

"Yes you are, wimp."

"… At least I can pronounce my words properly."

"So can I. I know a lot of words. Like, discombobulate, disambiguation, and filigree. So there!"

"What is this?" Yuuri asked pointing to the microwave.

"It's a, um, a miwaveco-food maker hotter thingie." Wolf stuttered, hating being proven wrong.

Yuuri smirked and they went into the living room. "What about that?" he pointed to the TV.

"It's a felly-vixen, duh." He knew that one for sure.

"Bzzzz! Wrong! It's a _television_ Wolf."

"FINE, wimp. What does antidisestablishmentarianism mean then?" he held his chin up, knowing he had him.

"It's a religious movement in the 19th century to disestablish the Church of England as the official state church. So there, brat!"

Wolf's only retort was a sob as he turned and ran upstairs to his and Yuuri's bedroom.

After he gave him a few minutes to cry and get it out of his system, Yuuri followed and stepped into the room, seeing Wolf laying on the bed, sniffling.

"Wolf, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. I like how you mix up your words, it's cute."

"I hate it here. I miss my family, and my life. I don't know anything about this world. I miss being in control of my life." he gave another choking sob and Yuuri hugged him allowing him to cry into his shoulder.

He cried himself into a fitful sleep, whimpering, and calling for his mother and brothers.

Yuuri filled the bath tub up and tried to get the portal to open so he and Wolf could go home, but nothing worked. After his tenth attempt, a rolled parchment bobbed to the top of the water. He recognized the seal on the wax as belonging to the Great Sage. It read:

Dear Yuuri and Wolfram,

You may not return to Shin Makoku until the month is up. On June 1st, the portal will reopen to you and allow the both of you to come back. Till then, enjoy your vacation.

Love you lots,

Ken-Ken.

There is today's story. I'm going to leave it off right there for now. Tomorrow, Wolf will find out what the Sage has perpetrated on them. How's that for a mean cliffhanger? Review to let me know how you liked it, or hated it. Bye!


	21. Chapter 21

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 21

Disclaimer: pssht.

a/n: this chapter was one suggested by CheyanneChika and it fits perfectly here due to yesterday's headache. Tomorrow's chapter is a special one written just for Wolfram von Bielefeld. She was the 100th reviewer by default, so look for tomorrow's special request chapter. Lovles!

May 20

Yuuri took a lunch tray upstairs with warm veggie soup and crackers for his sick blonde fiancée. during the night, he kicked off the blankets and Shouri had turned down the air conditioner which made him sick with a cold. And due to him being on Earth and not back home, he didn't get well as soon as he'd like.

Mama made him promise to stay in bed and rest to help the fever and even made him chicken noodle soup, but in Wolf's own words, "I refuse to partake! The chicken is the most revered of the domesticated poultry and highly prized for it's plumage."

That had earned him an odd look from the normally tolerant woman. She made him a soup with no meat, as she was unsure of his other eating habits. She added a small pot of herbal tea and some dry toast to the tray and let her youngest take it up to the frustrated demon.

"Here Wolf. It's vegetable soup and toast. It'll make you feel better." he set it down on the bed across his lap and made himself comfy on the side of the bed.

"The only thing I want is to go home. I'm tired of this place. Your family is nice, but I miss mine. I miss food that tastes good, and I miss the maids' cookies and cakes." he sniffed more from the tears than the cold, "I miss my mother and her goofy 'free love' search."

"Here. Don't cry. It's not good for your illness." he offered him a Kleenex from the box on his bedside table. "Besides, we can't go home until June first."

Wolf looked up from his meal, "What do you mean?"

Yuuri handed him the parchment with the broken seal on it, "here, read it and check out the insignia."

He gave out a creative string of curses after looking over the script. "I'm going to roast that bastard alive and giggle maniacally as he screams while my fire lion is eating his flesh!" he came up with several other different scenarios for the unlucky sage's demise.

A coughing fit soon had him settled into the bed after being medicated. Yuuri took the tray back to the kitchen and met his mother on her way up to see about something.

"He's asleep, Mom."

"That's ok. I need you to go to the store for milk, please. Money is on the table."

"Alright. Anything else while I'm out?"

"Nope!"

Later that night….

Miko was printing the pictures off her digital camera that she took that afternoon. One was of Wolf in pale pink lipstick and pink bows, another had him in a flowery sun dress with pigtails. Blush was all over his face along with light eyeliner. He never woke up from his medicated slumber, even with all the moving about.

Poor Wolfram. He's being kicked while he's down. Evil pics being taken when he can't defend himself. WHEN WILL IT END? Please read and review. Thanks!


	22. Chapter 22

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 22

Disclaimer: We sail the ocean blue, and the saucy ship's a beauty….

a/n: Chapter 22 is written for Usa~chan, since she is the 100th reviewer by default, she got to request a chapter. So here's to you, ma'am.

May 21

Yuuri stayed home again with Wolf to keep him company. The night was rainy, and oddly cool for this time of year, and the blonde was unable to go outside for his cold. Miko allowed him out of bed with the agreement that he was not to overdo it.

"Let's watch a movie. Shouri's friend loaned me House on Haunted Hill, and it's supposed to be really scary." he put the disc in and they sat down with popcorn and sodas. The first few minutes went by uneventfully until the chandelier almost hit the young woman.

Yuuri watched Wolf twitch and flinch during the beginning, and when the old woman popped out of nowhere in the dark room he gave a shriek and tackled the brunette.

"YAAAHHHHH! I hate this movie! It's really scary!"

"Come on, Wolf. It's not that bad. It's just an old black and white movie that's super cheesy." he was secretly pleased when the blonde climbed in his lap and wrapped his arms around his neck.

He'd whimper and hide his face from the screen when something scary came up. Yuuri put his arms around the smaller demon protectively to let him know he was ok. The scene with the lady hanging outside the window scared him so much, Yuuri felt tears fall on his neck.

"Wolf, it's ok." he kissed to top of the golden head and moved his hand to the bottom of the t-shirt the blonde was wearing and slipped it up just enough to touch the soft skin underneath. The gesture made Wolfram's breath hitch and he moaned lightly when the hand eased a little higher.

Wolf kissed Yuuri on the neck and when he moved to straddle his lap, Yuuri placed him back on the couch.

"Movie's over. Man was that a good one. I love the classics."

Wolf just sat there looking at him, panting, and his eyes glazed over with lust. "GRRRR….I'm taking a shower,"

Yuuri just shrugged and put in another movie to watch while his friend went upstairs.

Hee hee. How mean was that? Yuuri just wanted to distract the poor boy so he could watch his show. Btw, that movie kicks major ass. I used to watch it as a little kid and laugh at it. The newer one isn't nearly as good. Oh yeah, cookies to anyone who can tell me where the disclaimer came from. Review as always. Love-love!


	23. Chapter 23

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 23

Disclaimer: here we go again, hands making circles, and we can't turn back again, sky turning purple….

a/n: once again my good friend CheyanneChika suggested this chapter. It made for a good filler chapter, so bear with me. It's going to be nothing but dialogue between Yuuri and Wolfram.

May 22

Yuuri had decided after spending time with his fiancée (yes, he can admit it to even himself now), and he wanted to get to know all about him and his family.

"Hey Wolf, since you and I are engaged, why aren't Conrad and Gwendal?"

"Weller and Big Brother are engaged. They just choose not to advertise it. Not even Mother knows about it, or she'd be driving them insane with her 'helpful planning.' know what I mean?"

"Mm. I guess I can see that. Sooo, who are they engaged to?"

"None of your business, wimp."

"Come on, Wolf! I really wanna know!"

"Stop whining like a child!"

"Fine. I'll bet Annissina lets Gwen whine all he wants."

"For your information, he's marrying Lady Tetyana von Englestein…oopps"

"A-HAA! I WIN!"

"Nuh uh. I still never said who Weller is marrying. So there!"

"Grrr… I'll kiss you and do one thing for you if you tell me."

"Anything?"

"Anything. Just please tell me. I hate suspense."

"Hmmm… okay. Weller is engaged to Claiborne Wilberforce. He's a sergeant in his troop."

"Wow. I've never met him before."

"Ok. Now I get something."

"OK. Here."

"Not so fast. First I want you to do----"

When the family came home, they went into the kitchen to prepare dinner to find Yuuri tied to a chair with makeup all over his face and a perm set into his hair. Wolf walked into the kitchen with one of Miko's bras in his hand before he saw them.

"Ummm…."

"We can explain?"

Later, when they were in bed, Wolfram turned over and said, "I lied by the way. Weller isn't really engaged. It was worth the look on your face when your parents walked in the kitchen." He kissed him on the cheek, "Night!"

Yuuri dreamed of getting even with the spoiled brat.

I know it's a tad late, but I had things I couldn't postpone. Urgh. Oh well. Read and review! Loves!


	24. Chapter 24

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 24

Disclaimer: I'm walking on sunshine, woooaaaahh!

a/n: I apologize for being late. Things have been happening and stressing me out to the point where I have no control over anything. I will try to be more prompt with me updates. Don't forget to review and let me know about how I'm doing! This one is for Usa~chan who gave me the word: bruises.

May 23

Wolf was bored out of his mind watching Yuuri play with the ball-bases and the clubs. He went over to the fencing equipment and took out a foil and gave it a quick whip. When he held it to look at the handle, a weight made him spin around causing him to smack the offender in the face.

"Yuuri! I'm so sorry! Are you okay?"

He managed to get his hand away to expose an angry red mark which was quickly turning purple on the brunette's cheek. "I'm fine. It's just a minor bruise."

"Can I help you find something?" the young sales clerk asked.

They both turned to look at him and Yuuri said, "No, thanks. I think we can manage, although, can you point out where the catcher's mitts are. I can't seem t find them…"

When the clerk gestured, Yuuri naturally turned to follow the line of direction and the bat he had slung over his shoulder connected with Wolfram's face with a resounding CRACK!

"WOLF! Oh my gods, I'm so sorry! Whoa, talk about déjà vu. Are you ok?"

"Wimp, of course I'm not ok. You hit me and probably left a bruise!"

"and I apologized. Besides, you hit he with the jabby pokey thingie."

"It's called a fencing foil, not that you'd know that."

"Look Wolf, I'm sorry." he leaned over and kissed the boo-boo better, causing the blonde to give a little wince from the pressure on the sore spot.

"It's fine. I'm sorry I yelled at you." he gave a small sigh and returned the kiss to the king's cheek.

When they got home, Shouri made the remark on how they seemed to get into another 'discussion' on who would be the man in their marriage.

Shouma just said, "I so didn't need to hear about that."

OK. Here's the next chapter. As always, burn after reading. Or just save your computers and review. Bye!


	25. Chapter 25

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 25

Disclaimer: I know a song that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends!

a/n: hello! Anybody out there? I know you're there, cause I hear you breathing. I need reviews. If I don't any, then my friend will not like me anymore. Sniff, do you want me to lose my only friend? *sad violin music* I must smile on, which is today's prompted word, smile. Suggested by the ever pleasant and faithful reviewer, Usa~chan. Hint hint.

May 24

Wolfram was in the house all alone for a change. Yuuri went out with his guy friends and managed to talk the grumpy blonde into staying by promising a sweet surprise when he returned. The others were out doing whatever they usually do to make the story plausible, so let's thank them later for cooperating.

Wolf was snooping around in Shouri's bathroom and found teeth whitening strips. He could not read the characters on the box that passed for writing on this backward world. He opened it out of curiosity and was able to decipher the picture and gain the understanding that he was supposed to put the thing on his teeth to make them white.

He was no fool, he knew looks were important. He had them, but it's been a couple of weeks since he last got to use any Mazoku neem tooth cleaner, so he felt that his smile wasn't as brilliant and stunning like usual.

He opened the packet and smoothed the plastic over his teeth and stood there feeling quite the fool. After a while, he couldn't take the taste anymore and he spit them out in the trash can by the sink. Wolf looked in the mirror and smiled and noticed they were a bit whiter, and he was satisfied that he'd dazzle his black haired fiancé later.

Next, he found some hair gel and knew what it was for. He'd seen Father wear it to the office with his hair slicked back. He squirted some out into his hand and smooshed it down onto his wavy blonde locks. A comb laid on the back of the sink and he tried to run it through, but the stuff had dried and couldn't be combed without a lot of painful pulling.

After digging around in the medicine chest, he came across zit cream and Preparation H. there were no pictures on either tube, so he had no clue. He opened the haemorrhoid cream and smeared some on his face. The smell was ghastly, but he wanted to please his love. The zit cream he dabbed behind he ears for fragrance, and he splashed a double handful of aftershave onto his face.

He carefully replaced all the toiletries and straightened up the bathroom so his future brother-in-law wouldn't know he was snooping around. He gave one last look in the mirror and thought he looked the right fool with his hair globbed up and him smelling like a cheap drug store.

He sat down to watch the magic window into another realm, not paying attention, distracted as he was from the odours rolling off of him. The TV was tuned to an American show by the name of Eureka. He sat patiently, and began to despise his smell so much.

After nearly falling asleep, he heard the front door open and in walked his brunette fiancé.

"Yuuri! I missed you!" he cried after jumping up to greet him.

"Hey Wolf- WHEW! What is that awful smell?" He pinched his nose shut, the noticed what should have been obvious, "umm, what's wrong with you hair? It looks weird."

"I gelled it. And I found some face cream and cologne water. Do you like it? I did it just for you."

Yuuri stood there looking at him in shock. The longer he stood there, the more self conscious Wolf became. After several minutes of silence, Wolf stomped upstairs with a loud growl.

He felt stupid and ashamed. He just tried to make that stupid wimp happy. After a hot shower, he dressed and went downstairs, head slumped in defeat.

"Wolf, you don't have to get made up like that to please me. I love you just like you are. I want you to be you. Not someone who just focuses on looks. Ok?"

"Ok." he sniffled. He looked up and smiled at the brunette.

"I love you smile. It's always so sparkling. Do you whiten with anything?"

"Nope. I guess I'm naturally just sparkly."

Ok. There you have it. I need reviews to thrive, and I am non thriving right now. So send them in. you know you wanna…I'll love you for ever if you do….


	26. Chapter 26

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 26

Disclaimer: enter generic disclaimer here.

a/n: Today's chapter is written by myself and my friend Usa who is doing her best to distract me. Her word for the day is moon.

May 25

Wolfram and Yuuri were sitting out back as the sun set in the west, as the moon rose above the horizon and it was big and full. Shouma had grilled outside on the patio and they ate on newly replaced lawn furniture. The yard had been fixed from the earthquake, as far as anybody knew, it had traumatized poor Wolf.

"Why is the moon much bigger here than back home?" Wolf asked more out of boredom than want of knowledge.

"Well you see Wolfram, when a mommy kitty and a daddy kitty love each other very much, they stop asking me pointless questions." Yuuri said shortly.

Wolf just looked at him like he lost his ever loving mind. He was scratching his neck, leaving red welts behind that looked very angry.

"Hey, Yuuri? My name is Yuuri too. Let's go to the Yuuri and get some Yuuri for the Yuuri." his neck was swelling a bit and hives were covering his face.

He fell out of his chair, clutching at his throat. Before he passed out, he pulled his fiancée down close to him, and Wolf leaned down to catch his last words, "CONSTANTINOPLE!" then he passed smooth out, leaving the blonde to gape at him with confused anger.

"Con-con-CONSTANINOPLE?" he screeched in in utter anguish. "Yuuri! Don't lick my laptop! Or my personal belongings!" I his delirious state, he fell out of his chair next to his brunette fiancé with swollen throat and hives covering every inch of pale skin.

"SHOUMA! The boys passed out! And I think they have the measles!" Miko yelled in fear for the two boys.

Later that night….

Yuuri and Wolfram were laying in separate beds in a semi private room with the curtains open to let in the moon light.

"Yuuri, why is the moon brighter here than back home?"

"It's because of the werewolves. They decided to keep it as far away as possible so they don't lose their minds over it."

"Oh. Goodnight, moon."

This chapter was fun to write. Let me know how you liked it. I needed to try to break up the mushy monotony of romance, cause it's supposed to be funny. The weirdness is from Wolfram von Bielefeld. Read her stuff. It's funny too. Except for one of them. It's sad. Oh well, read it anyways.


	27. Chapter 27

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 27

Disclaimer: gloom, despair, and agony on me. Deep dark depression and excessive misery.

a/n: ok. Today's story is dedicated to my mother who gave me the key word for this chapter: toaster. So even though she dislikes my favourite thing in the world, he's to you, Ma.

May 26

Wolfram and Yuuri were released from the hospital and back at home, still groggy from the meds. The cause of the allergic reaction was Canola oil. It's something that all Mazoku are sensitive to, mainly because there is none in the other world. Shouma and Miko had used it to keep the meant from sticking on the grill.

Yuuri popped his bagel into the toaster to prep it for the cream cheese topping, when Wolf dropped his glass of juice all over the floor.

"Sorry, Yuu. Didn't mean to."

"Sa'right, Wolf. No problem." their words were slurred from the drugs that would keep the rash from getting out of control. He grabbed a washcloth and wiped the liquid up slowly, making certain he didn't miss any. It took all his concentration. (get it? It's a juice joke. Concentrate!)

"Here, lemme help," the blonde grabbed the paper towels and used the entire roll to mop at it. They worked and got the mess up after much effort on both parts.

Afterwards, they stood by the counter, and Yuuri started to think that he had forgotten something…but what?

BLEEP! BLEEP! BLEEP! Went the smoke alarm, and then it hit him like a ton of wet diapers: his bagel. He forgot to watch it. He stumbled over and unplugged it from the wall socket and it made the toaster pop, but the bagel was still wedged inside.

He sighed and dug the burnt offering out and he remembered something else: he put the cream cheese on it before toasting. Duh.

"Oh well," he sighed, taking a bite. He handed the other half to Wolf who in his drugged state ate it without tasting it.

"Thanks. Zat's good. 'm goin' at bed. Night."

"Me too. Night."

They both laid down in the kitchen floor and took their naps while the older people were out again for mysterious reasons that just happened to be convenient for this story. They were found a couple of hours later and carried to bed.

Awwww. Now tell me that wasn't just so adorable. Review it and make me happy. Pwease? Just to clarify the last chapter, they had an allergic reaction to a food. I have no clue if the Japanese have toasters, but they do cause I said so. XP


	28. Chapter 28

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 28

Disclaimer: It seems today, that all you see, is violence in movies, and sex on TV…

a/n: this chapter is dedicated to me. I came up with the whole idea all by myself. GO ME! The word is Warehouse 13!

May 27

The whole family was sitting in the tatami room watching TV, or rather flipping through the channels, arguing about what to watch. Wolf just sat there on the floor, with his knees drawn up under his chin, not paying any mind to the surrounding chaos, when the TV stopped on a show with a woman on a phone. As he started to focus on the screen, she was hit with an oblong object he remembered seeing at the 'shorting hoods' store with Yuuri.

"Can we watch this? It looks funny. The woman got hit with a, uh, whatcha call it….Kneeball!"

"You mean a football, dear, and of course we can watch this. It seems like a nice show." Miko jerked the remote out of Shouma's hands and gave it to the blonde. "Here. You may pick today."

They sat and watched as a teapot made a ferret, and a picture trapped them. In a later episode, a magic pen and book made the woman's dad sick, and Wolf felt the pain she went through.

It was an all day marathon of the show, and Wolf sat until his legs were asleep, and soon he followed suit. Yuuri helped him to his feet, and lugged him up the stairs.

"Yuuri?" the sleepy boy said to his lover, "I love that show. I want to watch it all the time." He held his arms up so his shirt could be pulled off. The brunette couldn't help himself. He leaned forward and kissed Wolf's collar bone and relished in the small moan. He bit down on it and gave him a love bite. "Mine."

"Yours." Wolf kissed the side of his neck and sucked hard on it, making him gasp and lean into it a bit. He felt hot breath on it, and was about to proceed, but a loud snore in his ear stopped him cold.

After a loud sigh escaped his lips, he laid him down and pulled his shorts off. He left him in his boxers and pulled the covers over them both and snuggled up with the fire Mazoku. A soft kiss to pink lips, and he followed him into dreamland.

One dreamed of golden lovers, and the other dreamed of ferret spewing teapots.

Ok, CheyanneChika, there is Warehouse 13, and Wolf loves it. Read and review! I need it to feed my ferrets who are actually 3 very grumpy guinea pigs. If you've never had one for a pet, you'd love one. I have 3 and a neurotic Jack Russell. Try living with THAT going on.


	29. Chapter 29

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 29

Disclaimer: Bad boys, bad boys, whatch gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when they come for you!

a/n: Asura Chan has gifted me with excellent ideas, however it was too soon for me to implement them earlier in the month. I had written them down, but not forgotten them. Here's to you!

May 28

Wolf had walked to the store to get his future mother-in-law some flour for her dinner she was in the middle of cooking. Yuuri was out with the boys as was Shouri and Shouma was doing his dad thing that kept him out of the house. The blonde demon decided to stay with Mama so he could see what it would feel like for his soon to be husband to come home to him.

He was so busy mooning after the brunette, he wasn't even paying attention, and soon found himself surrounded by some street thugs who looked as bad as they smelled, which was a lot.

"Hey baby! WOOT! Come ovuh here and shake that thang!" (poor grammar, but written as it was spoken)

The leader who had a red bandana tied around his head stepped forward and pinned the smaller male to a wall with an arm on either side of his head.

"I think I'm in love. Smooch woochy."

"Get away from me, you smelly, lard bellied, son of a pig farming whore monger!" his knee came up and caught his admirer in the crotch, effectively rendering him a eunuch.

"HEY! You blonde bimbo! You can't do dat to out boss!" the other 3 clods began to close in and Wolf's mind was forming a quick strategy to take out the others, when a loud voice called his name, causing the gang to spin around and face the scary sight of a skinny, black haired teenager, dressed in a t-shirt, cargo shorts and sandals…with socks?

"Why don't you jerks pick on somebody your own size?" while he spoke, his hair lengthened, his black eyes gain slitted pupils, and the voice got gained a few octaves. "Neighbourhood bullies like you are scared little boys. You deserve to get turned over my knee and spanked soundly!"

The head of the three flunkies looked at the double black like he had worms in his nose and replied, "If I wore sandals and socks like you, I'd be brave. Blondie ain't worth it. Let's blow this joint. You need rehab or something, dude. At minimum, you need to say yes to the dress."

They helped their boss to his feet and hobbled away to whatever rat infested flea hole they crawled out of. The maou looked over at his fiancée, and he took his hand in his and they walked home together.

"I love you, Yuuri. Even if you are just a wimp wearing socks with sandals."

The maou gave him a toothy grin and kissed the top of his head lovingly.

Ahhh… how sweet. The blonde and his dork in sandals with socks. In my house there's this whole thing about that topic. I prefer to wear socks with my sandals to the pool or to the beach to keep the friggin' sand out, and my family mock this practice. Jerks. Anywho. Please review!


	30. Chapter 30

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 30

Disclaimer: It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

a/n: I'm sad. This fic is rolling to a close, and soon it shall end. I hope that you will continue to humour me and read my future things. Ok, on with the beginning of the end.

May 29

"I'm tired. My legs ache, and Wolf is puking again." Yuuri whined. Give him some credit; he had spent the last 4 hours in the cramped backseat of the family car with a motion sick green faced blonde Mazoku. They had to stop every half hour or so just to get a clean bag for him. You would think he had emptied his stomach, but somehow, it just keeps coming.

"I need to stop please." he moaned.

"We're almost there," Shouma said over the roar of the wind. He had opened the windows to lower the smell.

"There it is!" Miko squeed in her excited happiness. They pulled up to the cabin and Wolf bailed out in a hurry, his legs weak from his constant vomiting.

"It's nice. It makes me think of the Maou's Coastal Hideaway back home."

"I've never seen it. Maybe we can honeymoon there…" he whispered in his fiancée's ear, causing him to shiver in pleasure.

"I'm going to clean up now. Where is the lavatory?"

"I'll show you, babe." He pulled him inside and up the stairs. He let him change clothes and brush his teeth before he wrapped around him from behind.

"You smell good, Wolf. I want to eat you up. Rooaahhh!" the blonde gave an undignified squeal and let his neck get mauled by the hungry lion that pinned him to the wall.

"A-hem. We're about to go get sandwich meat for dinner. You two stay out of trouble, ok? No sex below the neck, either one of you." Shouma warned, sternly before he left with his wife.

Yuuri pulled Wolf out the back door and they walked down to the boathouse, holding hands with light conversation. When they got to the water, they took off their shoes and put their feet in the cool lake and allowed the fishies to nibble on their toes.

Wolf looked at the double black from under his eyelashes and he shyly leaned towards him for a kiss. He actually caught the hint and turned his face to capture the bright pink lips with his, loving every second with this sweet boy. The male factor no longer bothered him like it used too.

"Yuuri, I love you. Do you love me?"

"Yes, I do. I'm sorry it took so long for me to realize that. Can you ever forgive me, Wolf?"

"Only if you promise to never leave me. And you have to kiss me again."

"My pleasure." he swooped down and pressed his lips to Wolf's and this time, he decided to take it a tad further to feel out his boundary. He licked the lower lip, asking permission for entrance, which was granted instantly. He slipped his tongue inside the hot cavern of Wolf's mouth and nearly died when a shiver of excitement trilled down their spines.

"Mn, Yuuri. That was fabulous."

"It was. Wolf, would you bear our children when we get married?"

"Of course. But if I do, you will cater to my every whim and you will keep me happy, or else."

"Else what?"

"Else I will remove you genitals and keep it in a jar, next to my side of the bed."

"Love you too, babe."

There. The set up for the final days of their month on Earth. This is kind of what Asura Chan suggested, but not quite. The next chapter will be what she said, and then the last day is the big on. Yayness! Review please! LOVE YOU ALL!


	31. Chapter 31

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter 31

Disclaimer: well, after all this time, still nothing. Sorry.

a/n: one more day to go. Asura Chan sent me this idea almost at the beginning, but it was the wrong time for it. So after all the wait, here you go! The rating will go up to M tomorrow, so any of you too sensitive for it, stop after today, ok? Just remember, you all said you wanted it, so I'm going for it. Love all of you!

May 30

"Yuuri, let's go look for shells on the beach." Wolf said, looking at his brunette fiancé. He pulled him up off the couch and was pleased when he didn't meet any resistance.

"Wolf," he pulled him back and sneaked him a kiss, "we need to stay inside. It's going to rain. The weather report said so."

The blonde stuck his lower lip out in a pout and huffed, "But I wanna go out. We've been stuck inside for hours because of the rain, and if I don't get to see the beach, I won't let you kiss me anymore." to prove his point, he turned his face away.

Yuuri sighed, "ok. Get your sandals on and we'll go. I'll leave a note for Mom and Dad. You know, it's so funny how they just randomly leave just when the plot needs it. Huh."

Wolfram and Yuuri walked out the door holding hands and took the wooded path down to the sandy beach, which thanks to the heavy overcast sky was windy and not too hot.

"Yuuri, when we get home, will you still love me as much as you do now?"

"Yes, and I won't feel odd about admitting it either."

"Then say it, wimp."

"Don't call me a wimp."

"Then tell me you love me, wimp."

"Grrrr….I love you, brat."

"Tee hee, I know. Love you too, wimp."

Yuuri growled again and pulled him into a tight embrace and forced his tongue into the blonde's mouth without asking for permission. When he pulled back, Wolf looked at him dazedly and gave a stuttered "Wow.."

"And don't forget it."

Somewhere off in the distance, a loud thunderclap sounded followed by a lightning flash. They continued kissing and only when the rain began to pour did they separate and run for the cabin.

They slammed the door after them and Wolf went upstairs to change into dry and warm clothes. Yuuri followed and they were soon naked in his room, and Wolf licked a water trail off of the maou's shoulder.

"Mmmm…I'd stop if I were you." he pulled back, and when Wolf went to protest, he pulled the curtains aside and there were Mom and Dad home from random business.

"Ok, maybe later." the blonde pressed another kiss to his lips and they dressed quickly and went downstairs to help carry in groceries.

Ok,ok, I know, but tomorrow is the big day. This is a filler chapter so yeah. I'm sad about the last chapter. It's been super fun, but alas, all good things must come to an end. See you tomorrow!


	32. Chapter 32

Thirty-one Days of May

Chapter the Last

Disclaimer: So long and thanks for all the fish, so sad that it should come to this, we tried to warn you all, but oh nooo!

a/n: so here it is. The last chapter and the big sex scene. It's very sad that it's over now. This one is for all my lovely readers: Usa~chan, Asura Chan, CheyanneChika, Yukinothekoneko, elst, yuuran2fangirl, and all the others that I fail to list, I love you all…I'll be back as soon as possible. Yukinothekoneko is talking about posting a July challenge, so just message her and get the particulars if you are interested.

May 31

Today was the day that the Sage and Shinou imposed exile would be over. Wolfram was very ready with his new clothes and his memory box all wrapped in waterproof plastic. Yuuri had some of his things packed as well.

"Well, goodbye Mom, Dad. I'll be back as soon as I can. Gwendal probably has a bunch of things for me to sign, and Gunter will need to catch up with his lessons." they walked outside to the kiddy wading pool and Miko grabbed Wolf in a big smothering hug.

"I'm going to miss you, Wolfie-chan. I can't wait to see yours and Yuu-chan's babies. They are going to be beautiful." she released him and stepped back.

"I'll miss you too, Mama, Father. I can't wait till I'm part of your family officially."

Yuuri took his hand and they jumped into the pool with a loud splash. The whirlpool never came, and they stood there in ankle high water, holding hands.

Another letter bobbed to the surface of the water, and the brunette grabbed it.

"It's from Murata. It says,

Dear Shibuya and Lord von Bielefeld,

By now, you know that you can't get back just yet. We feel that you aren't ready yet to return. You can come back when we decide that you learned your lesson and will not continue to fight amongst yourselves. If you want to bring peace to our world, you must bring peace to your own lives first.

Sincerely,

Murata and Shinou 3

Yuuri looked up from the parchment and saw a golden blur disappearing into the forest. He gave chase and finally caught the crying Mazoku after tracking him for almost an hour.

"Wolf-"

"I want to go home now!" he sobbed out.

"Yuuri hugged him tight and whispered, "I know you do. I want to get home too. I don't get what they mean. we don't fight hardly these days."

He was worried about how to comfort the upset blonde, so he decided to make him happy. He kissed him deeply and worked till he got his shirt off. A few kisses later had him on his back panting and arching his back to gain friction.

"Mmn, Yuuri, please! Need you now!"

"In due time, Wolfcub." the double black licked his way down his chest and dipped his tongue into his navel, tugging on his new piercing making him moan in need.

"Yuuri, take off your shirt. I want to see you, too." he said, as he pulled on the garment. He chuckled and obliged his fiancée and soon to be lover. Wolf ran his hands down the strong, hairless chest of the maou and pinched his nipple, eliciting a sharp gasp from the bigger boy.

"That was very naughty, Wolfcub. I'm the seme here, don't forget that fact." it took little time for him to unfasten the blonde's pants and he soon had them off with the boxers. Wandering hands and tongue explored the virgin territory and he was relishing the mewls coming from his wolf.

He pulled his own pants off and his manhood sprung to life, leaving precum smeared on his belly. Preparation was swift as was the penetration. Wolf arched his back and moaned loudly as his lover pumped inside of him hard and fast.

"YUUURRRIIIII!" howled Wolf as he came violently between them, the spasming of his channel causing the double black to follow him off the edge. They lay there panting and sweaty.

"Come on. Let's go to the lake and clean up." Yuuri pulled him up and they picked up their clothes and plastic wrapped bundles and one walked while the other limped to the water.

As soon as they stepped in, the whirlpool appeared and sucked them down. When the spinning stopped, they staggered up on shaky legs and discovered that they were in the temple maidens' bathing room, which was full of shrine maidens bathing.

Murata stood there with Shinou perched on his shoulder smirking like he knew all the answers, "You know, My Lord, we'll need to run now and hide before they notice us."

"Yes, let's."

Ok. There is the last chapter. As promised, the big sex scene. I know it lacks, but I decided to keep it brief to fit the guidelines. Well, review and say goodbye to me. I will be back soon, so never fear! LOVLES and HUGGLES!


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